At this time of year, it's customary for newspapers and magazines to fill the acres of empty space where news should be, with fatuous lists of what's in and what's out for the new year. As one who is always a sucker for a fatuous list or two, we thought we'd compile our own...

OUT: Telly tubbies

IN: the Night Garden

Sorry La-La and crew but you are so last year as far as Olivia is concerned. It's the ninky-nonk all the way for us now.

OUT: Licking the TV

IN: Hiding behind the TV

Not actaully sure which of these is least likely to lead to possible electrocution; that thicket of wires, scart leads and plugs can't be too safe, but then neither can wiping your tongue across the screen.

OUT: Getting dressed in 5 minutes flat

IN: Getting dressed in 50 minutes flat. If we're lucky.

We're hoping that this is a short-lived thing, but at present getting Olivia from pyjamas to fully clothed via a change of nappy and a wash can take anything up to an hour. If this continues I may never arrive at work on time again. Or the straps are coming out.

IN: Food

OUT: Food. The same mouthful of food unfortunately.

While the full on Bobby Sands diet is no longer being pursued with quite the same vigour as previously reported, meal-times are still a time of subterfuge and attrition.

That concludes our guide to current trends in the Olivia-verse. Daddy would like it to be known that you should ingore all this media hype about Adele and Duffy - Didos the pair of 'em - and buy shares in Laura Marling instead.