What the Dickens..?

Until now the question of paternity, the suspicion that Cath may have played false with another, has never once even flitted through my brain. Yes Olivia had fluked her way clear of the gentic inheritance that is part and parcel of being a Bland - an outlandishly big hooter - but this is not in itself suspicious. Then I arrived home this very evening to be confronted with the sight of Olivia dressed in what can only be described as full Dickensian garb, and the penny dropped. Some of you may be aware that Cath harbours a gigantic crush on comedian Russell Brand. If Brand is known for anything it's his dandyish, Victorian attire, his eruption of hair, and his innumerable liasions with the opposite sex.

Suddenly it all became clear; the shock of dark , unruly hair that Olivia was born with, and now the desire to clothe herself in a costume last considered trendy when Queen Victoria was on the throne... Cath, you swine!